Habit of Respect

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Habit of Respect

Parent personal integrity check

1. I sometimes borrow things without asking permission.
2. I sometimes gossip about my co workers or family member
3. I cannot help but use foul language to make a point when I am angry.
4. I think that I know best when it comes to my children; they should listen to me all the time.

Treat children with respect and they will learn to be respectful, kindness, consideration, courtesy  and understanding are all part of the habit of respect. How children are treated at home becomes a template for how they treat other children, and eventually, their bosses, co workers, subordinates and customers.

Lesson from Parents – Habit of Respect

Tony Tan Caktiong

(President and CEO, Jolibee Food Corp.)

            While growing up in Davao(Souther Mindanao), he and his brothers worked in their family restaurant where their father was also the chef. From his parents, they learned two basic ingredients that led to the Jolibee phenomenon – good food and humility.

            Tan Caktiong credits his parents for cultivating his entrepreneurial spirit and instilling in him the values of respect and humility, which are now ingrained in the corporate culture of Jolibee. Everyone in Jolibee – from the CEO to a store’s kitchen crew – respectfully address each other as “Sir” or “Ma’am”

How can the Habit of Respect be developed?

Respect the rights and things of others. Teach children to ask permission first before tanking anything that is not theirs. “Ask ate if you can barrow her scissors but promise to take care of it”. “Ask lola if you can have some of the cake” or “I know that you want to borrow the magazine but she bought it so she has right to read it first”. Practice respect at home.

            Do not gossip about others. The habit of gossiping is the hardest to break so do not get your child started on it. Do not talk about people behind their backs(especially family member and co-workers). When children tattle-tale or “make Sumbong”, encourage them to go to that person and tell them they feel.

Be courteous. Watch your language. Do not say anything you do not want your child to repeat. Believe me they will! Be courteous to everyone. Say “please” and “thank you” even to salespersons. Waiters and household help. You need to always be polite and courteous to everyone, regardless of rank or status, because they may be your costumers in the future.

Be Respectful when dealing with others. Show kindness and consideration when dealing with others. One day, a some boys were excitedly chatting in the office, not knowing that they were noisy. I went over to them and instead of reprimanding them, I told them respectfully: “Boys I have a hard time working because of your noise, kindly tone it down.” My daughter who heard me, said, “Mom, I think it’s great how you tell people what to do without making them fell bad. I will try your way with a classmate who does not want to cooperate. He doesn’t like being scolded or shouted at but when you ask him nicely, he’ll follow.” If you shout at your helpers or workers and get results, your child will probably end up shouting at her employees too!

Respect other for who they are. Learning to accept others for who they are depends on how accepted you yourself feel. If parents have the habit of comparing children or of showing favoritism for the “smart” one, their children will probably only respect people whom they like. Let us be models for our children to respect people regardless of their looks, social status, gender and capability. We should show respect towards others regardless of how we feel about them or whether or not we like them.

Respect other people’s ideas and point of view. We should genuinely LISTEN to children when they express a thought, concern or story. Sometimes it is difficult when we are so busy and what they are saying may sound trivial or may just be an annoying question, BUT if we want them to learn to listen to us, we need to listen to them. What is worse is when they start to question you! It will be a challenge to keep your cool and respect their point of view. When they see that you are more open to getting at the truth than just “being right”, they too will learn to keep an open mind and respect other people’s perspectives, especially those they do not always agree with. An entrepreneur is the boss and will need to work with others who will support his ideas. You will need to convince and not coerce people to share your ideas.